No More

I really felt like my heart broke in two today. My girls had their GI specialist appointments today and of course I was grilled as to why I was there? What are their GI symptoms?.... yada yada yada. The answer to all those questions is that they are healthy, have NO signs of GI problems, however they are little. To me this is pretty much a joke since my sister NEVER charted and the rest of us were near the bottom. All my nieces and nephews are all tiny too and nothing is wrong with them! For some reason we have been put through the ringer for it and I am SICK OF IT! They want us now to go to a nutritionist (which I already did when Adeline was a baby and it was NO HELP and she was totally rude), want follow up appointments and made us get more labs. I was just in there two weeks ago with Norah while they pinned her down and took loads of blood. Adeline DID NOT want to go today in fear she was getting a "shot". Of course she was devastated when she found out she had to. The took 10-15 tubes of blood from her and I had to hold her tight in my lap. She screamed and screamed and I could not take it. I started bawling too and Norah was also screaming while strapped in her stroller. I felt like the WORST mom ever since the doctors are only doing this to make themselves feel better. I keep saying, "ok, I will do the labs to make them feel better"... but then they just keep wanting more and I am done. After they were done with Adeline I turned her around to give her a big hug and she pushed away from me because she was so mad. She finally gave in and gave me a big hug. Then of course they gave Norah to me to hold down and took blood from her. She looked up at me and was screaming the entire time and I felt horrible. This little girl has 2 ear infections, bronchiolitis and 5 teeth coming in and I ALLOWED them to stick her and put her in MORE PAIN. I left the doctors office totally distraught and went straight to the McDonalds drive thru to get adeline a ice cream. I cried ordering the ice cream and cried through my next couple of phone calls.... this also resulted in a massive headache. We will see what the labs say and if something is wrong, so be it... I will be glad to know. Most likely they will have no answers again and will want to do MORE... and I will finally say NO!!! And I will be cancelling my nutritionist appointment, because that is just ridiculous.

What a great birthday! Abe and I were able to go out to dinner after we put our kids to bed and had someone come sit at our house. I told him that if we weren't able to do that, I am not sure if I would have recovered from my day.